Veena Krishna

Friday, August 27, 2021

Twisty Tale of Toilets!

Warning – This is a shitty article so read it at your own risk.

Meghna: Hi Laila. What are you doing?

Laila: Hey Meghna. There you are. I was waiting for you.

I am doing my yoga exercises. This is known as the full squat in yoga. I am 40 years old now. I can’t believe that once upon a time I was doing this so easily. Now I can’t sit even halfway down. Sadhguruji says one must do it every morning for a minute or two.

Meghna: Oh yes I am so familiar with this pose. It is etched in my memory forever. I have seen a whole crowd doing this pose out in the open fields each day for over a decade.

Laila:  Where? Which Yoga Course? And they do it in the open?

Meghna: Yes. When I used to travel to college which was at Sion in Mumbai. I had to pass Dharavi slum area. So you see so many of them doing this pose. Many a times there would be traffic. So my bus or rickshaw would be standing still for 5 minutes. I observed, they would just sit there in this pose for 5 minutes and then it would come out.

Laila: Yuck. Yuck. You are ugly. Why are you telling me all these dirty details.

Meghna: Ha, Ha, What is dirty. We are all made of shit and we have to throw our shit out every day, otherwise we will stink.

Laila: My God, what is happened to the prim and proper Meghna. Lets change the topic. What would you like to drink?

Meghna: Since we are on it, why not try the drink our former Prime Minister Morarji Desai used to have often?

Laila: Meghna stop it. I’ll get you some orange juice. Hey and you made me forget why I called you. I bought a new flat! My first own flat! It is on this same road. My big news got covered under your shitty talks.

Mehgna: Oh very sorry. That’s great news. Wow, your own flat. A big, big congratulations. Lets go and see the flat.

Laila: Yes, lets go.

Mehgna: Wow. The flat is cute. Nice and cosy. And you have already started some renovations.

Laila: Yes it is a very old flat. Maybe more than 50 years old. A senior couple owned it. Now they have moved to their children’s place and they decided to sell it. I would often meet them during my evening walks. I had told them I was looking to buy a place. So I was the first one they informed and they sold it to me at a decent price.

Mehgna: That’s so nice of them. So what is this work you are doing here? What are they breaking and making? What was there earlier?

Laila: Oh that was the Indian style toilet. There were two toilets. One Indian and one western style. The house interiors have not been touched for over 50 years.

Mehgna: So what are you doing with the Indian toilet?

Laila: What else? Breaking it and converting it to western style toilet. Who uses the Indian style toilet nowadays?

Meghna: The full squat. You could have done the practice inside the toilet. The shit would come out nice and smooth.

Laila:  Oh my Meghna…. We are back to our shit.