Twisty Tale of Redevelopment

 

Meeting on with the real estate developer and resident members of the society. For convenience we will now say D for Developer and RM for Resident Member.

 

D: We have good news for all of you. We have decided to not only have marble flooring in the lobby of the building but the living room of each flat will also now have marble flooring.

RMs: Clapping, thumping on the table, cheering.

RM Sheela: Sir what about the trees?

D: What about them?

RM Naina: Sir the 10 trees in the society which are more than 40 years old, how will we ensure they are protected.

D: Do not worry about trees. We will be cutting down the trees and replanting.

RM Sheela: Sir replanting those 10 trees again?

D: Not 10 trees, 30 trees

RMs : Clapping, cheering, thumping on the tables.

RM Sheela: That is so nice sir. We will have more trees. But sir how will you keep those 10 trees alive till you finish the construction.

D: We will be planting 30 new trees.

RM Naina : Oh and will those trees be the original real ones.

RMs:  Sir we are wasting too much time on trees. Let us continue on other important matters.

D: Now another good news. For the woman of the house. We will be having a separate exclusive garbage bin area outside the kitchen so you won’t get the smells of the garbage.

RMs :  Clapping, cheering, thumping on the tables.

RM Naina whispering to Sheela (for the woman of the house!!!)

RM Naina: Sir won’t it be cumbersome for the woman of the house to walk outside the kitchen and throw the garbage?

D: The woman of the house needs exercise, ha, ha.

RM Sheela: Sir what about the wet and dry garbage?

D: What about them? You will continue as you are doing now, have separate bins for them.

RM Sheela: Sir when I was staying in my friend’s house in New York some years ago, they had a great system where each resident, throws the garbage collected in an environment friendly bag, down a chute which is at one corner of each floor. The garbage men collect it from down below. This is so convenient, a much cleaner system and saves us from keeping our bins outside, waiting for the man to collect and many times we are not at home when he comes.

RM Sukunthi whispering to Malathi : She just wants to show off she was in New York. RM Malathi : So true.

D: Well then you may have to sell your flat here and buy one in New York. We don’t have that system here.

RM Naina: How can you be so rude sir?

RM Sukunthi: He is stating a fact. Please let us move on.

D: Another big news. Now we will have central water heating system where you don’t need to have those big geysers in your bathroom or attic for hot water.

RMs:  Clapping, cheering, thumping on the tables.

RM Naina: Sir what about solar heating?

D: What about it? We will have some solar energy but can’t have too much as the solar panels will take a lot of space on the terrace. You need a big open terrace for your parties and get-togethers. Am I right members?

RMs: Yes, yes sir, please don’t crowd the terrace with unnecessary things.

D: Now the big news. We will be having an exclusive park for the dogs.

RMs: They can’t control their joy. Everyone standing, laughing, cheering, thumping the tables.

D: ok, ok relax, lets continue.

RM Sheela: Sir what about a small exercise gym in the garden for senior citizens. Many doctors are suggesting that senior citizens must do some cycling on a stationary cycle, some weights, stretching exercises to keep their muscles toned.

D: We will see if we have space for that.

D: Now another good news. We were earlier keeping the facility for air-conditioning only in the bedrooms but now we have decided to keep the facility in the living rooms also considering the Indian summer heat.

RMs:  Clapping, cheering, thumping on the tables.

RM Naina: Sir are we not keeping provision for nets on the window?

RMs: No, No we don’t need nets. They look so dirty and who has the time to keep cleaning them.

RM Sheela: But during the day and especially during the night we have to close all the windows and it will get suffocating. How can we sleep within closed windows? The net is a good system to bring in fresh air and oxygen.

D: You have the air-conditioning for that. Switch it on. Ha, Ha.

D: Ok now the big, big news. In addition to the monthly payment of Rs 60,000 to each member, we will also be giving a lumpsum of Rs 1 crore to each member.

RMs: The chairs are empty. Many members have fallen off their chair.

PS: Majority of the members are of the opinion that Sheela and Naina have gone senile.